Schwarzenegger slams Palin

By Skinnymojo

In a move guaranteed to make waves in the conservative community, California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger questioned the motives of fellow Republican Sarah Palin for opposing stricter emissions controls for combating the heavily-debated climate change.

Last Tuesday, at the international climate change summit in Copenhagen, Gov. Schwarzenegger commented, "You have to ask: what was she trying to accomplish?...Is she really interested in this subject or is she interested in her career and in winning the (Republican presidential) nomination? You have to take all these things with a grain of salt."

"I smell bullshit."

"Palin-sanity's runnin' WILD! WHOOOOA YEEEAH!"

Not one to back down from such a heated challenge, Schwarzenegger agreed to face off against Palin in front of a sold-out Madison Square Garden crowd later that evening.

Before the match, Schwarzenegger was overheard telling color-commentator "Mean" Gene Okerlund, "Oh yeah, Mean Gene, you know what's about to go down! I'm gonna show these loyal fans out here what it means to crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and they're gonna hear the lamentation of this woman! You know how I am, brother - I would rather solve this whole thing without resorting to violence, but she called me out! She asked for the storm, and I'm about to bring the thunder!" Schwarzenegger followed this with several grand-standing "body-builder" poses, then patted Okerlund on the back and assured him, "I'll be back, Mean Gene."

Schwarzenegger, talking trash pre-match.

Palin, ready to deliver the beat-down.

Schwarzenegger gave her the signal to "bring it on", which Palin followed by sprinting to the ring. In a flash, and just in time for the bell to ring, Palin began pummeling Schwarzenegger with karate-chops to the neck, followed by an Irish-whip and a clothesline. A few well-timed dropkicks and leg-drops later, and it seemed Schwarzenegger might have bitten off more than he could chew. Then, in a surprise turn of events, former Minnesota governor Jesse "The Body" Ventura came out of nowhere, jumped into the ring, and smashed Palin over the head with the steel chair. With the referee distracted, Schwarzenegger kicked Palin in the stomach and body-slammed her into the chair. The crowd went soccer-riot insane - booing and throwing soda-cans at the ring - as Schwarzenegger pinned Palin for a highly-dubious three-count. Declared the winner, the California governor high-fived Ventura, then strutted victoriously out of the stadium. After shaking off the effects of being slammed into a steel chair, Palin grabbed a microphone, and swore revenge.

"This ain't over, AH-NOOLD! This ain't over by a long-shot! You haven't seen the last of me! Palin-sanity's gonna getcha!"

To the cheers (and cat-calls) of the calamitous fans, Palin smiled and winked her way backstage, where she promised to "shove climate change up Schwarzenegger's ass next time! You BETCHA, OOOOOHHHHH YEEEEEEEAH!"